To: The Culture Ambassador, Alien Starship
From: GCU Pretentious Twaddle, currently in orbit around Ziemia
To: Jamal MacCaffral, Triaan'i Udom Junior School, Daan'a, Kanzanea, Ziemia
My name is Ingeta. I am the Culture Ambassador to Ziemia. I can sometimes be found aboard the General Contact Unit Pretentious Twaddle, although I frequently travel to different parts of your planet.
The part of the Culture I work for is called Contact. In Contact, we actively seek out planets which are less well developed. There are lots and lots of planets like this in the galaxy.
When we find a planet, we think really, really hard about the best way to help. Our purpose is to reduce suffering and to improve the quality of life for everybody - not just a few old rich people. Sometimes, the best way is to not interfere at all. Sometimes, we make changes without anybody on the planet being aware of it. And sometimes, like Ziemia, we announce our presence publicly.
We don't want to make everybody exactly like the Culture. I feel sure that, one day, the people of this world will become something amazing, although it probably won't be like us. It might be much better.
Kuboul Rabaransa Losaet Ingeta Ngoh dam J'salf